It's a Friday and I come home from work, grab a Pepsi, throw my coat on the couch, sit down in my chair and check my email. The house is peaceful, serene, and quiet. I don't feel like cooking and don't have to have dinner ready at any certain time. In a little while I'll put some Mexican food in the microwave and put on a DVD of "Bewitched". Yeah, I love those old classic TV shows. You may call me weird, but I prefer the term "special".
The sink is full of dirty dishes because I simply haven't felt like doing them lately. Last night when I could have been doing the dishes, I snuggled under some blankets and got immersed in a good true crime book. And you know what? There's no one to nag me about not cooking or doing dishes and no one to make me feel so tense that I can't enjoy a good book.
I'm FREE!!!!! Free at last, free at last, thank God Almighty, I'm free at last!
It's true I have gotten lazy around the house putting off on chores to do more enjoyable things instead, but I have no one else to pick up after, no one else's expectations to meet, and no one to nag and fuss if I'm not the perfect little Ms. Homemaker.
I am my own boss and I am totally loving my independence. I can do what I want when I want and I'm loving it.
And the atmosphere here at home is so calm, so serene, so wonderful. During the troublesome times of marriage, it was so tense and awful. I couldn't even relax in my own home. I always felt on edge and I couldn't get my mind on anything except the horrible state of my marriage. I constantly felt on edge because the atmosphere just wasn't right. It wasn't loving, it wasn't peaceful like it should have been. I just wanted things fixed, but there was no fixing that could be done. I couldn't stand to live like that, I was going crazy. For example, when I was being ignored, I couldn't concentrate what was on TV, I would have never been able to forget my troubles long enough to read, I couldn't enjoy anything. Now there is no one to ignore me and no one to fight with.
I'm enjoying living alone so much that I worry if I'm too much of a loner. But I really do enjoy it.
I never imagine I'd get to this point of feeling so happy, so in control of my life, and so independent. I thought I would be heartbroken and depressed for all eternity. While the end of a marriage is painful, sometimes it really is for the best.
I have found out that divorce can be awesome!
Sometimes relationships just can't work out and staying together only prolongs the pain and the inevitable. Getting divorced let's you break free of all the problems in the relationship, get into a healthier enviroment, and get in control of your life.
There is sunshine after the storm.
